I love my husband, he is my first love, the love is what I cannot explain. We have a neighbour, who is also married, he once asked me out which I told my husband about it, my husband confronted him and it led to a big problem which was settled at the police station.
Some months after giving birth to my last child, my husband started giving attitude, he started abusing me with some bad words. Any little mistake, he would take it up with me. He later told me that he suspected that the baby was not his own, I thought it was a joke, but he took it up. We had a serious argument that night and he chased me out of the house, some neighbours came to beg on my behalf, but he did not open the door for us, so I slept outside with the children. The next morning, he threw my things outside, and when I realized he meant it, I called his mother. She called him immediately, but my husband refused, so Grandma said I should be coming over to her place. I did not have any money on me, so I begged a neighbour who gave me money to get a vehicle to grandma’s place.
A family meeting was fixed for us, my parents also came there, all efforts to settle the issue, my husband refused, he said in the presence of everyone that he had divorced me, that he could not marry me as a wife again, despite pleading with him, he walked out of the meeting. After a week, I moved my things to my parents’ house. It wasn’t easy at all, I fell sick, terribly sick, I called my husband, but he would not pick up. He rather sent a message to me, “I have divorced you, you are no longer my wife’. I cried for days but I had to accept my fate.
People advised me to pick up my life again, it was not easy because I love him, I went back to work, and I needed to leave my parents’ house because it was becoming embarrassing for me, so I was able to get some money, I rented a room and I moved there with my children, three of them.
After about two years and some months, one day, I saw his call, I picked up and he didn’t even greet me, he just asked after the children, that he would like to see them. I was reluctant at first, but I also saw it as a way of assisting me financially with the kids because it has not been easy. I gave him the address he came to visit the children, and he bought things for them and gave them money. He started coming, I didn’t tell my parents, because they had warned me not to allow him to come near to me or the children because of his actions.
Unfortunately, one thing led to another, and we started having sexual intercourse in the process, he would come to the house when the children were not at home, and we have been doing this continuously, one day, I told him to let us come back as husband and wife, he bluntly refused that it can not happen again, I felt bad but I still love him, so anytime he asks for sex, I find it difficult to say No.
The problem is I heard a lecture from one Alfa that when husband and wife divorce, they cannot touch each other, and if they do, they are fornicating ….. Please, is it true, am I doing the right thing? Please I need advice.
Abu Sheikh